i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize