I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
