What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
