I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Randomize
