Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
