another moral hangover. fuck.
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
