Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
How many fucks given?
0.12846
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
