So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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