My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize