Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
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