He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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