Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
vagina is talking i cant
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize