I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
