Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
