y did u give ur computer a hand job?
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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