So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
