worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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