Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
