I don't think brook has ever known best
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Less talking, more tequila
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
