carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Randomize
