OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize