Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
