so explain again why im purple
no
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize
