the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
