Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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