i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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