Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
