scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
