How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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