He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Randomize