are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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