Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I need to wash the frat house off of me
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize