I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
