do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Randomize
