their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
