wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
