some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize