who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
just tell him i said nine months
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
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