should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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