this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
