My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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