At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
