YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize