I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
