bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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