But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize