My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize