loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
