Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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