Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
