I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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