she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
